Lost And Found

These days, to find any meaningful work in music you most likely will have to travel to another location.   Playing for a Cruise Line is still a decent employment opportunity. It’s steady work and you get a chance to play some interesting music in the ship's entertainment program.

Some of my acquaintances have been doing this line of work for many years and still enjoy it.   However, the down side is that you will be away from home for several months at a time.  

Contracts can run from three months to six months or longer. However, you do get a chance to visit some exciting locations that enjoy ideal weather, sandy beaches  (erotic sun bathers) and exotic sights. To work some of these locations you would fly to perhaps to Ft Lauderdale, San Diego or Vancouver and board the ships at these ports.

Travel isn't as easy as it used to be since 9/ 11 and documentation now includes a valid Passport.   The screening understandably is more stringent these days and the safety considerations result in endless searches and you are subjected to an array of intrusive questions.

I worked one cruise that took us down south to beautiful Tahiti. We boarded the ship at San Diego. At the termination of the contract you would board at (San Diego) fly to Chicago for a stop over (to change Air Lines) and then fly home. (Toronto)

When you have a stopover you are always concerned about your luggage and musical instruments being transferred to the next plane if there is a change of carrier.  Air Lines are notorious for losing baggage in these circumstances and it's always a good idea to be heavily ensured if your horn or horns are packed in this manner.

On this particular trip coming back we stopped off at Chicago and changed Air Lines for the final leg to Toronto.   When I got here in TO my luggage was nowhere to be found. However, United Air Lines was trying to be helpful and gave me an emergency phone number to call immediately at Pearson Airport to initiate a search. 

I called the number they gave me and was immediately engaged by a female voice that was very efficient and courteous.   She systematically asked the necessary particulars so that they could start a search for the lost baggage.  I have to admit she sounded very professional and reassuring.

She asked, "What was your point of departure?" I responded San Diego (she repeated my answer). She then inquired, "What was your destination?" "I said Toronto" (she repeated Toronto).  

She then asked, "Did you have a stop over." I was about to answer Chicago when I realized I had been taken in. There wasn't any "live" person on the other line from customer services trying to help me but a mechanical voice that was responding to my answers "phonetically."

I have to admit that the ruse was so good that I didn't catch on that something as important as lost luggage and a very valuable instrument was being handled by a robot.

Well, let me tell you. I was livid. What a preposterous way to handle something of this importance.

Well, I blew it and in anger and frustrated resignation I blurted out an expletive response to the stopover question. She repeated politely, (phonetically)  "Fargo North Dakota?"

What? 

I believe a lot of people have also experienced this machine and the whole insensitive exercise about "Fargo." 

I'll swear to it.

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